a hat with a view of the world

Manager: Jim Leyland

Card: 1986 Topps Traded #66T

Errors: Bad uni. Bald spot visible through three-story hat.

Comments: "Jim, come in. Have a seat. We're glad you could make it today.

"Make yourself comfortable. You like that big chair, Jim? How's it feel - comfy? Good, good. Because, well, that's actually what we wanted to talk to you about, Jim.

"Chuck's done a hell of a job for us, Jim. No one will ever forget the '79 Series. Unforgettable. But, well, the last two years the Pirates finished sixth. Lost 104 games last year. Just not acceptable in Pittsburgh, you understand Jim.

"And, well, we just love what you're doing down there in Evansville. Fantastic stuff, Jim, really.

"I'll just be direct here. Chuck's stepping down and we'd like you to consider taking the manager's job. There's a substantial raise obviously. But there's more, Jim.

"You'll have some good young talent, too, Jim. Pena, Bream - they're ready to go. Bobby Bonds' kid should be ready to play this year. He's skinny, but he's the real deal. Plus, we've got our eye on the Cardinals' centerfielder, this pitcher with the Yankees and an outfielder from the White Sox, Bob Bonilla. It's an up-and-coming squad, Jim. We really think so.

"You'll do it? That's great, Jim. That's just great. We think this is a perfect match. A good fit, really.

"Oh, Jim. Before you go. One more thing. We almost forgot. You'll still get the talent, and the raise, and the big chair, and all that. But you're going to have to wear a hat made of mosquito netting. And it's about three feet tall. It's a completely ridiculous hat, Jim, but, well, we feel very strongly about this.

"Oh sure, Jim, you think about it. Talk to your wife. That's fine. We'll be here, waiting, Jim, with the chair, and the raise, and the talent. And the stovepipe baseball hat.

"Talk to you soon, Jim."

Scoring: 6-4-3