Thursday, August 7, 2008

a nice place to visit

Player: Ruben Sierra
Card: 1992 Topps Stadium Club #387
Errors: Player is neither at a stadium, nor wearing a baseball uniform, nor in the act of playing a sport. Player borrowed his hat from a Love Boat passenger. Nice bling.
Dear Ruben Sierra,
My mother has reached the advanced stages of Alzheimer's. She requires constant care and doesn't recognize any of her family members. We love her so much and desperately don't want to send her to a nursing home. Unfortunately, her care has become exhausting to me and my wife. We're fighting with each other more than we ever have. Mom sacrificed a lot for me, so I feel like I owe it to her, but how can my wife and I love Mom - and still find time to love each other?
Frustrated in Flagstaff
Dear Flagstaff,
Thank you for writing Ruben Sierra. The love of our mothers is a very precious thing. Have you considered bringing the family to Puerto Rico? With both Spanish and English as the official languages, Puerto Rico is considered the crossroads where Spanish and Anglo cultures meet. Puerto Rico uses American currency, so it's a place the whole family can feel closer. Give it a try.
Sincerely, Ruben Sierra

Dear Ruben Sierra,
I'm a self-diagnosed car nut, who owns six vehicles. But for driving around, I prefer my 2004 Dodge Ram. It's got 103,00 miles but I treat that car as good as my kids: regular tune-ups, oil changes and she stays in the garage all winter. Last week, I was on my way to work and she started backfiring on a bridge with a slight incline. Now, she backfires every time I go uphill. I checked the fuel injectors, the gaskets, but can't find the problem. Any ideas?
Baffled in Buffalo
Dear Baffled,
Thank you for writing to Ruben Sierra. With close to four million residents, reliable transportation is always a high priority where I grew up: Puerto Rico. Did you know the average temperature is 83 degrees in the winter? This 35-mile long island is known as the "Island of Enchantment" for its diverse climates. So come and stay for a weekend, a week or a month! Also, check your spark plugs and ignition coils.
Sincerely, Ruben Sierra

Dear Ruben Sierra,
I'm 18, so this is the first year I'll be able to vote in the presidential election. I know I should care, but I'm just not that interested. Neither candidate seems to be speaking my language. But my dad says it's my duty to vote. Isn't it my right to express myself by NOT voting?
Perplexed in Pasadena
Dear Perplexed,
Thank you for writing to Ruben Sierra. Taking part in the governmental process can be a confusing time in a young person's life. We've learned that the hard way in Puerto Rico, where we have been part of the United States since 1898 - but still don't have a vote in Congress. Fortunately, since Puerto Rican residents are U.S. citizens, travelers do not have to worry about customs duties on any goods brought out of Puerto Rico to the mainland. Additionally, almost all Puerto Rican businesses accept major credit cards, and ATMs are easily accessible. Why don't you exercise your freedom and come visit us in Puerto Rico?
Sincerely, Ruben Sierra
Scoring: 9-2

1 comment:

Spiff said...

Great card. I enjoyed the write up. Quite a bit more amusing than the one I did on the same card a month or so ago.