Thursday, April 3, 2008

flow it, show it, long as god can grow it

Player: Steve Trout
Card: 1981 Topps #552
Errors: Player may have caught Tom Henke Disease. Despite Major League pedigree, player has rookie-ball haircut. At least one fan (right, in yellow) decided to flee stadium rather than face hair/eyewear combo.
Comments: Welcome to Uglee Card's 2008 Salute!...to hair.
This month we will be celebrating the Hairy Scarys of MLB.
Making fun of a guy's height, his nose, his parents? Not cool. There's nothing he could do about that stuff; he was born into it.
But we can all go to the barber. Or, at least, lend our sister a pair of scissors.
Because when you make it to The Show, it's time for a Major League Buzz.
But Steve Trout never had a Crash Davis to teach him that. Instead, we're left with this candid picture, captured as Steve watched a hot dog vendor fall from the upper deck. In this graphic image, you can see all Trout's hair-related emotions: The embarrassment. The shame. The horror.
Or...um...at least you could see those feelings in his eyes. You know, if he wasn't wearing high-tech Sun Blocker 6000 glasses.
Well, 1981 Steve Trout, we here at Uglee Card salute you.
You are hereby awarded our first annual honorary: "Dave Coulier Shaggy Dog 'Do" Plaque. Wear it with pride, buddy.
Scoring: FO2

2 comments:

White Sox Cards said...

And by 1986, he would sport a 'do that could rival my grandmother's. He kinda looked like her in 1986 too.

NMboxer said...

You used lyrics from the musical Hair! I wonder if there is a player named Frank Mills?